Sent from my iPhone
Friday, May 22, 2015
Monday, April 20, 2015
Sent from my iPhone
Monday, September 28, 2009
11 weeks of late night phone calls, midday skype lunches, and weekend plane rides. It's almost sad to say that we are falling into the routine of a long distance marriage. Leaving the airport this time, my tears dried up before I reached the 408 toll road. I go to sleep to her voice on my phone and text her at first waking. "Good morning, how di dyou sleep?" We share our bad dreams, our good dreams, our schedules for the day, missing the bus, and makeup choices for the day. We txt through process meetings, sweeping hair off of floors, the commute home, me by foot, her on the bus. It's easy with the certainty that we are doing this for our future and failure is not an option. Our skype date is starting . . .
Thursday, September 3, 2009
A month after we first met, I cut all of my hair off for the umpteeth time. The wife hated it! Now we've switched places and she is exploring the wonders of her natural hair. Never thought I would see this day.
The wife with natural hair
Me with natural hair
If only I could keep up, keep this thing called life in check, then I would be better. The visit was short but amazing. Never should we go six weeks without seeing each other again. Distance does make the heart grow fonder but there is a point where fondness descends into a sort of madness in missing the other person. I have my feelings but God has her will. I am following the will and trying no to let my cyclical emotions get the best of me. At work and in marriage they seem to turn on a dime depending what and how someone says or does something to me. I seek serenity if I cant find harmony, it keeps things in perspective.
Tuesday, August 18, 2009
Tonight is a night for Nina. Working 13 days on, one day off, four more days till my weekend, and my wife is coming to visit. Everyday is performance, an intricate dance in and around everyone to prove that I belong. Not seeing anyone that looks like me for weeks. The mask is cracking.
I've anticipated this visit for the past few weeks and it alarms me that I only feel trepadation. Fear of having to perform in the one place that gives me comfort. I am not the same woman I was six weeks ago. This experince has me flat on my face like a baby just beginning to scoot.
Sometimes though when we can't muster the emotional or mental, we just have to appreciate the physical and hope that it can carry us.
Monday, July 27, 2009
Florida is a lover I can't let go. She woos me with her incessant summer, harvest moons, and monsoon season. First taking me at the tender age of 17, so pliable to her hospitality. It was here that I became a woman. In this place heartbreak, vengance, confusion, and dispair along with expectation, excitement, hope, and love came knocking on my door. She cradled me those nights I cried myself to sleep, fucked the pain away, and painted the first morning sun. I'm hoping my return is as profound as my introduction.